I'm stumped. I'm not so sure what is the answer. I'll do some research and get back to you if I bump into an anything. You should email the people at Medifast as they probably could answer your Medifast question..

Well....I think it Really Would make you feel better, lol....but it has to also be done with grace so it stings a bit more.

Now the question is ...am I bad for supporting your endevor?.

...aaah well..

Anna...

Thanks so much for the advice! I can always count on my raw Medifast food friends to cheer me up. I felt terrible that I was thinking that way, but I'll just use the negative in a positive way and have it be my extra little side motivation..

I will be showing you all a picture of the end result with my dress and everything. My sister said she would do my hair. teehee..

I have found that the best motivation for exercise comes from the joy of the exercise itself. I have woken up to a new day and gotten into my car and driven to the park for a jog and walked over to my starting line and then eased into a nice easy slow jog feeling OK and within a hundred yards or so I start to feel really good. My thoughts at that moment are usually about how good it feels to be moving and how this is the most important part of my day. The freedom and exhilaration of a good jog are the reasons I do it and keep getting up to a new day and doing it again and again. To meet goals I think it's OK to use whatever motivation works for you but when it comes down to really enjoying the exercise I think it's generated by the exercise itself and is it's own motivation and it's own reward...

Yeah I agree. I love exercise, especially once I'm into it. My issue is getting to the gym, or out for a run (in this weather). I'm sure once I really get back into my motivations will change...

How about communication? I haven't heard anyone suggest you use some nice open honest clear communication with your girlfriend. how about you invite her out for tea and let her know how you feel. she may have a really valid reason for leaving you out and if not, perhaps just you letting her know how you feel will assist YOU to move through these feelings..

I believe that when we are open, loving and honest with those who are important to us... our relationships deepen... cause who wants simple, surface relationships anyway? it the deep meaningful ones which bring me the greatest joy!..

Mel! Hey girl......I totally understand how you feel! No matter what anyone says, I'm positive we've ALL had those feelings of "well, I'll show THEM!"....and if anyone says otherwise, they're only fooling themselves! So don't feel bad! (how's that for cynicism?!) No, but really, I'm with the others who have said, go with whatever motivates you. For me, it's not so much a "show them" thing, more of a goal to look good at my cousin's wedding for ME, but I get where you're coming from. And you're right....I think that as you get into a groove, the initial reason why you started will fade, and a new motivation to just be fit, in general, will take over. Do what you gotta do, lady.....go to it!..

I agree with recycling goddess. Have you even asked your friend why she didn't ask you to be a bridesmaid? Have you actually told her you feel hurt by her not asking you? She may have not meant any harm by not asking you..

I mean you no offense. I am concerned that if you continue to say nothing, your bitterness will not go away. Also, it will likely be evident to those you care about, including your friend who is getting married. I'm guessing you wouldn't want her to feel bad about anything on her very special day, and a 13 year friendship is a very precious thing..

Also, if you tend to be an emotional eater (as many of us are), you are likely to deal with these suppressed hurt feelings in an unhealthy way at some point..

I wish you well as you continue trying to sort through how to deal with this situation. I suspect you are much more capable of taking the high road than you realize..

Much Love...

I think that is a very normal reaction to others hurting us, wanting to show them up.

I would be hurt by what has happened to you too. In fact I have a similar situation in my life with some friends that I've known for like 20 years, I seem to always be the one that is left out of things..

The only thing I would say is that I am most successful at staying raw when my motivation is to take care of myself, when the motivating factor is love. When I'm trying to change myself, lose weight, be more beautiful, a kind of unacceptance of my current self, it is harder to stay raw because it is more like a punishment because I'm not good enough. My best self conversations are to say, "no, you don't want to eat that because it will be bad for your body and you will feel bad after eating it. this nice raw thing will nourish you and give you energy"..

I agree having a conversation with your friend would be a good thing and to work towards forgiving your friend, even if she never apologizes. Forgiveness releases us, where as unforgiveness ends up robbing us much more than the person we won't forgive. My suggestion, do something extra special for yourself, pamper yourself...a nice massage maybe.

Your friend isn't valuing you as she should, so do something for yourself to reaffirm that you are valuable. Sorry this happened to you..

You are all right. It is good that I'm having this extra motivation, but my motivation for being raw should be all about a healthy me..

As for talking to her, I'm still thinking about it. I don't want bitter AND awkward feelings. I actually talked to another friend about it (one of the bridesmaids) that I was feeling a little left out. And she said that originally they didn't want any bridesmaids or groomsmen but the groom wanted his 3 best friends, so the bride agreed and took 3 bridesmaids. I mean, she could have had one more! You make up the rules for your own wedding. You know what I mean? My mom is convinced that she doesn't like me.

I just thought it was her pesonality but maybe it was a little more towards me. I don't know..

Also, when I poured out my feelings to my other friend, she implied that I wouldn't be her bridesmaid either (and she actually is one of my best friends). She was like "Yeah I'm going to have a hard time because there's Jennifer, my sister, Daniella ... so yeah.".

I moved away for almost 3 years and made amazing new friends when I was living in Toronto. Friends come and go, and I was just wishing that they would stay the same. I guess when I was gone they all changed and formed a new little clique without me...

Yeah yeah yeah but remember it's ok to feel crappy sometimes! I would have been very upset in the same circumstance. Something similar happened to me years ago, I felt awful!.

We're human and we have human feelings and none of us are the same. If this is what motivates you, that's fine too. Just don't let the negative feelings overtake you. Feel it and then move on..

Well you need to remember that she did pick her favourite three. Unfortunately you are not one of them but it sounds like she isn't one of your favourite either..

Weddings are so expensive and everything adds up quickly so I do understand keeping the bridesmaids numbers down but....

What is important here is YOU. Your feelings matter and it sounds like you need to work on letting go of the desire to be in the wedding and instead celebrate the fact that you get to wear what you want, do what you want and not partake in all those pictures LOL.

You get to eat without everyone staring at you (as they are at the head table).

You get to dance, celebrate and then leave on your own terms (as they have to stay till the end).

You only have to attend one shower (whereas they have to attend and buy a gift for them all).

Wow, you really are getting the good end of the stick!!!.

S:..

I think you shouldn't ask her why she didn't ask you. for a couple reasons:.

One is, after all, she is getting married in about a month and being asked tough/emotional questions during this tough/busy with planning/organizing/bride stuff time isn't really considerate..

Two is, well we all know how girls can get. if you ask her, then you're also risking a little "behind your back, bride talking to bridsmaids about you" thing..

That could create even more weird feelings at the wedding..

I think you shouldn't say anything, but definetley do work out and look hotter than ever, have a blast and be a suportive, nice friend when and if she needs you for somthing. you will be on high ground that way (and having fun too)..

I totally understand being hurt about this. just try to remember how emotional of a time this is probably is for her too right now..

Not that that means you shouldn't feel you should 'show em', because, like others have said...that is so totally normal! and not a bad motivation to have at all...i've had that as a great motivator many times and frankly I accomplished alot with it. good luck!.

J..

Hey, there's one more thing I wanted to add....

I know what it's like to move away for a few years, return one day and find that the friends you thought you were keeping touch with, have in fact, moved on..

It's sad, painfull and true. I was gone for 5 years and what I found is that some friends, you can actually regenerate, others are just gone..

They are not on the same path. it was painful for me to realize this but I realized, they were really different from me now any way..

The ones you can regenerate friendships with are really worth it, of course. i'll be ohnest and tell you, it took me about a year, frankly, to get over the ones that I lost. I couldn't understand why..

But now I am just greatful. greatful for the friends I have, for the strenght I gained from losing friends I thought I had, and greatful for this rich experience called life..

It's really hard, I know, but it does get wonderful again..

Wishing you the best,.

J..